29 days

Thats right, less than one month until graduation...

"Graduation is only a concept. In real life every day you graduate. Graduation is a process that goes on until the last day of your life. If you can grasp that, you'll make a difference."
-Arie Pencovici

This quote speaks to me today, as I am not only preparing for graduation, but for my career. Applying for a state licensure, taking the national board exam, and searching for jobs are all on my table currently. Graduation is only the beginning on the road to becoming a certified PA.

PANCE

I have officially registered to take the PANCE (Physician Assistant National Certifying Exam) on May 21, 2014. This is the day prior to my families arrival for graduation. I am hoping graduation and family will serve as a much needed distraction after the exam. After any major exam, there is little relief that it is over, simply worry about performance and the pending score. 

As graduation approaches, life has been a bit stressful. I imagined this time back on campus would be filled with happiness and relief that school is almost over. But instead, I am stressed that my exit exam is in one month and now board exams are approaching. The reality of student loan repayment is now very present. I will be moving back to Texas right after graduation. I am leaving California, this amazing place I have called home for three years. And most difficult for me to process, I will be leaving all the amazing friends/family I have here. On the other hand, I get to be home with my family for an entire year. I get to be back with my Jezebel. And I will be able to save a lot of money as I begin to pay off my student loans. 

How transient my life has been for these past years, makes me realize how precious time is, and how it shouldn't be wasted. 

"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time."

  - Abraham Lincoln

The Rain

As I sit in a coffee shop that I have spent far too much money in and endless hours studying, I am in my happy place. Sitting by the window with the water, ferry, a class of middle schoolers preparing to board the ferry, and the island shipyard all in view, I realize how I have missed this familiar place. It is a dreary, rainy day and I love it.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain."

-Vivian Greene

Siem Reap Province and the Temples of Angkor

The second weekend of our stay in Cambodia I traveled to Siem Reap Province with Lauren and Christi to see the Temples of Angkor. We left Phenom Penh at 11:00 pm and traveled for six and a half hours via the night bus. The night bus is set up so each person gets a "bed," which is a reclined seat. The ride was very bumpy and I am pretty sure the road was a single lane for portions of the trip, and our bus driver might have been playing "chicken" with oncoming traffic. Once we arrived, we found a tuk tuk driver that we had booked ahead of time, dropped our bags at the hotel and went straight to the temples to try to catch the sun rise over Angkor Wat. After three hours in Angkor Wat, we had breakfast and continued exploring. As the day progressed I was not feeling so great, I was really hot, feeling dehydrated and my abdomen was distended. The next 30 or so hours were not great (see previous blog) and because of it I missed out on the National Museum, where I would have learned a lot about Angkor Wat. Therefore I have been doing the research on my own, and thus this post has taken a lot of time to complete. In addition, there are thousands of temples in Siem Reap, ranging in size from Angkor Wat (the largest) to small temples that are simply a pile of rocks in a field. We barely scratched the surface, but were able to see some amazing structures. 

Angkor Wat

This beauty is considered the largest single religious monument in the world. It is often called the temple mountain, as it was built to represent Mt Meru, the home to the gods of Hinduism. It occupies over 400 acres of land, is surrounded by a moat, and has three terrace levels. The temple was built under King Suryavarman II who ruled from 1112-1152. The temple is unique in many ways, it was the largest of the temples built during the Angkorian period, it faces west, and the bas reliefs are counter clockwise. West is considered the direction of death, most if not all of the other temples built during this time were built facing east. It is believed that the temple was built as a funerary temple for the king. The bas relief, which are sculptures that have less depth, allowing them to be viewed from many angles without distortion of the figures (another example is the face of a coin), are seen in many of the temples, most commonly in clockwise direction. The counter clockwise direction of the bas relief in Angkor Wat further supports the idea of this temple being a funerary temple. 

Ray, N., Bloom, G. (2012). Cambodia. Melbourne, Australia: Lonely Planet Publications Pty Ltd. 

Upper: Angkor Wat, with the moat surrounding it. Behind the first structure you can see the temple in the background. Lower right: Statue of the god Vishnu. Often depicted as a protector, stands in the temple of Angkor Wat. Lower left: the lions protecting one of the entrances. 

Upper left: a view of a god in the west portico from the library. The temples are designed so the gods can be seen from all directions (north, east, south, west). In this temple they were usually framed by a window or door, I think this was also common practice. Upper right: Angkor Wat viewed from the Sandstone causeway as the sun was rising in the distance. It was pretty hazy this morning, so the sun rise wasn't quite what we were expecting. Lower two photos show the intricate details of the temple. There was not a doorway, wall, or corner that did not have beautiful detail. 

Upper: some of the bas relief. Lower left: inside the actual temple. Lower right: monkeys eating fruit one of the tourists was feeding them. 

Left: from inside the temple at the very top, looking out at the main entrance. Right: the very steep stair case to enter the temple. Inside the temples it is required that the shoulders and knees are covered. In the above photo I am wearing Lauren's shirt so I could go up to the top after she did. 

Angkor Thom
Meaning "large city" or "great city" depending on the source, was the last capital of the Khmer empire, completed around 1295. Built under the rule of King Jayavarman VII in response to the surprise attack on Angkor by the Chams.  As you approach the city gate you are greeted by tower faces. There is question if these faces represent the king himself or are protectors of the city. Angkor Thom is not a single temple but instead a city of temples, covering over 10 square kilometers.

Ray, N., Bloom, G. (2012). Cambodia. Melbourne, Australia: Lonely Planet Publications Pty Ltd.

Upper: the faces as you approach the gate of Angkor Thom. Lower left: the gate of Angkor Thom from the tuk tuk. Lower right: Bayon, the first temple we visiting within Angkor Thom. 

Bayon
This temple has over 50 towers with faces looking down in all directions. It is also in the exact middle of Angkor Thom. Many faces are visible from any place inside the temple.

Ray, N., Bloom, G. (2012). Cambodia. Melbourne, Australia: Lonely Planet Publications Pty Ltd.

Within the temple of Bayon. 

Baphuon

The temple mountain sanctuary, was built in 1060 by King Udayaityavarman II (1056-1066).  It was in the process of being restored when the Khmer Rouge took control of Cambodia. Because of this many stones lay around the temple, and though they are clearly labeled, they will likely never find their places on the central structure again because all the documents associated with the restoration were destroyed. 

Upper: standing on the causeway leading up to the temple. Lower: standing in front of a closed stairway in front of the temple. 

Upper right: the view from the top. Upper left: the three of us exploring the top of the temple, there were many low archways to walk through. Middle left: resting in the shade in a window. Middle right: another shot of me in front of the stairway! Lower left: the very top, it was closed. Lower right: I enjoyed this sign, I think all of us bumped our head at least once while in this temple. 

Phimeanakas
Meaning celestial place. We walked past this temple and decided not to go in. We were out of water and it was really hot. The temple also had at least two steep stairways to climb to enter, we weren't up for it on hour six of exploring. Walking through the temples was a lot like hiking, the terrain was often unpredictable and there was a lot of climbing and descending.  This temple is within Angkor Thom and has been left mostly unrestored.

Ta Prohm
The jungle temple, is the last temple we visited and is not a part of Angkor Thom. It is called the jungle temple because over time the trees have grown into the still existing structure, and it is quite beautiful. It was built in 1186 A.D. under the rule of Jayavarman VII. Unlike many other temples, it has not been restored and has been left in the condition in which it as found. It was added to the World Heritage List in 1992 by UNESCO and is one of the most visited temples in Siem Reap.

Upper left: this massive tree was dead and was being held up by this structure. I assume the purpose was to prevent the damage that would occur to the temple if the tree fell. Lower left: approaching the temple. Right: inside the temple. 

Left: one of the trees growing into the structure of the temple. Right: many doorways. 

Home

Yesterday, I made it back to the USA! I hadn't really processed how excited I was to be home until I was waiting in line to go through immigration, as a citizen and no longer a foreigner. In my first 24 hours home, I am still recovering from the diarrhea that started 18 hours prior to boarding in Cambodia (a departing gift from the country), and I have slept a lot, 16 hours to be exact, and want to sleep more. I still think twice before using water out of the tap, then realize how grateful I am to be doing so. My sheets smelled of clean laundry upon my arrival at Makani's house (thank you Donovan), a smell I have missed. Walking outside without shoes on, letting my toes explore the grass was amazing. I have no idea where I left all my belongings prior to my leaving, some are in my trunk, some in Makani's garage, some in my storage unit, I need to find some clothing that is more appropriate for California spring. We start class again tomorrow afternoon and I am hoping that my body will catch up after a crazy 36 + hours with less than five hours sleep and moving through several time zones.

Welcome to Bali

We have finished our final rough draft of our write up for Mother's Heart, after a month of hard work. We decided a couple weeks back that we would like to take a holiday while on this side of the world, and what better of a place to be than Bali! Diana, Malaika, Sean and I arrived early this evening, making it to our villa just in time for the end of the sunset. Our fridge was stocked with cold beer and the owner of our villa bought us dinner from a few of his favorite places. We ate on the second story outside (about half of the villa is outdoor space, including an open kitchen) and the food was just amazing. We are looking forward to making our way to the beach tomorrow and getting a feel for the town we are living in for the next 10 days!

We do still have a lot of work to finish up our public health field study, including a presentation to community leaders and key informants from the target area we were studying, to get their feedback on our results. In addition, once our write up is complete we will be writing an executive summary upon our return to the states, and we will likely be able to publish our work!

Looking forward to a restful night of sleep in the quiet, with the sound of water running in the koi pond outside my window.

Traveling

Things I have tired of here in Cambodia:

• Eating out every single meal
• Deet: This is necessary pretty much all the time. See photo below, this is what happens when sitting by a pool at dusk for an hour, when all the mosquitos come out, without wearing deet. I had at least 45 bites on my right leg, and many elsewhere. 
  
• Sunscreen: This must be worn everyday for me. 
• Sweating: Although I am from Texas and am used to the heat, it is odd that it is winter and so warm outside. I do miss wearing sweaters...
• Acne: Using sunscreen and deet everyday, my face and chest were a bit in shock. I had to buy acne medication for the first time in several years. 
• Diarrhea: I have had this bad twice, but pretty much have had on and off regularly since my arrival.
• Waste: Drinking only bottled water creates a lot of waste. 
• Trash: It is everywhere here and typically not contained. 
• Tuk tuks: I actually enjoy taking tuk tuks, it is nice not to have to drive, but it is rare that tuk tuk drivers know where they are taking you, which means you have to know how to give them directions. In addition, it is not very common for people to walk here, but I do it daily to the coffee shop and from there to the office. During my morning walk to the coffee shop the other day, a 5-7 minute walk, I counted the number of times I was asked if I wanted a tuk tuk or a moto ride. I was asked eight times, and I was walking at 9:00 am, which is less busy than 8:00 am, when I normally leave. It is also incredibly amusing when the same tuk tuk driver will ask you three or four different times during the process of walking by them, if you want a ride. 
• Negotiating cost for everything: There has not been a day that I haven't negotiated tuk tuk rides or prices at a local market. We have been doing this for a while, so we have a pretty good idea how often people are trying to rip us off. When I enter a store here and there are price tags, I sigh a breath of relief, because I know there will be no negotiations. 
• Being followed in stores: I am not sure if we are followed by employees because we are foreigners or if they do this with all customers to ensure they do not steal, but it is really weird being followed while trying to shop. I have walked out of stores a few times because I had a close shadow that I couldn't shake. 
• Smells: See last blog entry.  
• Noise: I love visiting cities, but living in the middle of a very busy city that basically never sleeps wears on you. Even in my room with all doors and windows closed, with the AC on, I can hear almost everything that is happening on the street. In addition, everything echoes through the streets and up the buildings because most buildings are made of tile and metal. 

Things I am looking forward to upon my return to the US:

• Cooking
• Fresh fruits and veggies
• Eating/drinking without the fear of diarrhea
• Drinking tap water
• Not being looked down upon/laughed at for walking
• My pillow
• The smell of clean laundry: The other day we were at a restaurant and their napkins smelled like fresh laundry, and I had forgotten how much I love the smell of clean laundry. I wash my clothes every week here and it smells clean and fresh coming out of the washer, but then I line dry it outside and it loses that scent before it is even dry.

Things I am glad that I packed:

• Toms: they are destroyed but keep my feet clean and protected.  
• Turkish towel: packs small, is soft, and dries fast. 
• Wash cloth: nice to scrub off the grime. 
• Pillow case: packs small and is my only bedding that is soft. 
• Nalgene bottle: perfect for mixing with electrolyte tablets. 
• Electrolyte tablets: sugar free nuun tablets, taste good without all the sweet stuff. The only electrolyte mixes we have found here have been packed with sugar. 
• Fjallraven kanken backpack (a gift from Kat): I have carried this with me everywhere, and somehow it is the one item of mine that has stayed clean without being washed regularly.
• Sound canceling headphones (borrowed from Michael): these made the plane ride here much more bearable.

Thus far this trip has opened my eyes to the privileged life I lead in America and that I have been leading here. Many of the things on this list have caused phases of frustration and acceptance, but ultimately if I had to choose I would prefer to leave behind in Cambodia, though I am grateful to have experienced them. Making this list I also realize how fast 3.5 weeks has gone and that in a very short time I will be boarding my flight to return home.

"No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow."
  - Lin Yutang